Archive for December, 2006

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And Let’s Not Forget The Guy Who’s Last Name Was ‘Butt’ — He Pronounced It “BYOOT”

14 December, 2006, Thursday

Tonight at work, I spoke to a woman on the phone and asked her what her name was.    She pronounced it “Cah-RIN”.     

“And how do you spell that?” I asked, running down a mental checklist of the many spelling variations that I have seen of her name.

She spelled it:  “K-a-r-e-n.”

I trust many native English speakers reading this will, as I did, roll their eyes and think vile things about her for being so ridiculously contrary about something that is commonly understood and accepted by a vast majority.      

Her name is not “Cah-RIN”.  It is Karen.  And, as Karen Carpenter did and the lovely Karen Grassle still does, it is pronounced “CARE-en”.

Is life just not difficult enough for her, I thought, irritated, as I finished up my business on the phone with her, that she must add one more arduous task to it?    I wondered  how often she’d corrected people in the course of her life and bitterly resented her for needlessly adding another tiny little dollop of confusion into our already chaotic world.

Later in the evening, I thought about my friend Janice from elementary school. 

Janice pronounced her name as “Juh-NEESE”.

Every year on the first day of school when the teacher would take attendance by calling out each student’s name, the teacher would get to Janice’s name and call out “JA-nis G.?”, and every year Janice would correct him or her.    And if our regular teacher was out ill for the day, she would correct the substitute teacher during that attendance call.  

But what I remembered last night was my reaction to Janice and her name.  And my reaction was no reaction at all.   She was simply a girl who liked her name pronounced Juh-NEESE and I accepted it fully and completely, without any judgement.

It’s very little wonder that I recall being a much happier individual then as compared to the one I have become. 

The fact that this Karen woman, a stranger that I will likely never speak to again, pronounces her name differently should not matter the slightest to me.     Yet it irritated me enough that once I finished with her phone call, I complained to other people in the room about it and they all groaned about it, too!       Misery has the best tea parties. 

It happens to so many of us.  We get comfy in a rut, stay too long in a job that fulfills only one of our needs, and our unhappiness begins to show.  

It’s been 30 years since I was in elementary school and sometime between then and now, life has worn me down to the point where I can become pissed off about the way a woman pronounces her name.   Fortunately, I’m still young and strong enough to beat the fucker back.   The question is, will I? 

It’s clear to me that I must.  Because people will never, ever stop being irritating, troublesome, pains in the arse.   And if I don’t start addressing my own attitude toward this truth, then the things that bother me will become even tinier.     And that’s a scary thought. 

“Hell is other people.” – Sartre

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A Travesty Of Justice!

12 December, 2006, Tuesday

Remember the college boys who made the sexist and racist remarks in the Borat movie and who sued to have their scenes cut from the DVD release claiming they were tricked by alcohol and their own judgement skills that are on par with a potato?     

Well, sadly, the judge rejected it.   The DVD will be released with all scenes intact.   Stupid judge.   

Of all the miscarriages…I mean, honestly – who hasn’t gotten drunk and denied the Holocaust happened?   

Keep fighting the good fight, boys.    You make us more proud with each and every news article we read about you.  

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Caution: Beware Of Falling Preachers

12 December, 2006, Tuesday

Shocking Evangelical news of the day: another pastor has resigned because of hot man-on-man sex.

Here’s what Paul Barnes of Grace Temple Church in Colorado said to his congregation via a wrenching videotaped message:

“I have struggled with homosexuality since I was a 5-year-old boy … I can’t tell you the number of nights I have cried myself to sleep, begging God to take this away.”

My, my.   That is a sad little picture he’s painted for himself, what with the boo-hoo face and the quivery lip and all.   But I ain’t falling for it.   The only thing I feel is savage contempt. 

Sorry, but a man who collapses under the crushing weight of an oppressive culture that he, himself worked for 28 years to promote is not worthy of any sympathy.  On the contrary, his fall is divinely poetic in it’s justice.   

He didn’t step up and admit to his homosexual dalliances because he wanted to be honest and do the right thing by his congregation.   Oh, if only he had, this post would have a much different tone.  

Doing the right thing wasn’t even remotely close to the reason for his disclosure.  The disgusting creep did it because someone had anonymously threatened to drop a dime.   To, ahem, blow the whistle on him and go public.

What inner strength!   What principles!    What bullshit. 

If the threat of public outing had never occurred, it’s a pretty safe bet that he would be right now planning his sermon for next Sunday’s services;  a sermon that, quite possibly, would have included plenty of condemnation for the very carnal activities that this married father of two had partaken in on more than a few Saturday nights himself.   

He is nothing more than a lying hypocrit who got caught.   That’s all.

He is now on the ever-expanding list of powerful men of faith who’ve fallen with a magnificent thud.   He was found out, and he immediately resigned.   And now he will be swept quickly under the rug and forgotten in a desperate attempt by the church to keep it’s shameful foundational crack hidden from the tithing flock.   

I really don’t understand why so much of this country is still in the dark ages when it comes to homosexuality, but that’s where we are at this point in time.   So I accept that as a reality.  

But the dark-age dwellers have to accept a reality, too:  if you are going to stand up in front of people with the explicit purpose of telling them what is and is not proper for their lives, then you had better make damn fucking sure your own house is spotless of everything you condemn. 

Paul Barnes didn’t.

And since he chose to live by the sword, I smile with sheer delight as his severed head rolls around in the basket and I reserve my sympathy for those who truly deserve it.  

Namely, the thousands of everyday people who have been brutalized by strangers or shunned by their own families because they’ve dared to live open, honest lives in the harsh climate of hate that is spewed by fools like him in the name of their god.  

I like your Christ.  I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.” – Gandhi

Full article at Summit Daily News

Update:  This article makes me feel rather embarrassed about my leap to righteous anger about Paul Barnes. It states specifically that he was not politically aggressive – and I -wrongfully- assumed he was just like the rest of ’em who are. But in fact, he sounds like a decent kind of guy – the sort of Christian that I’ve heard tell of in stories about the olden days.

So I can no longer celebrate with wild abandon his downfall. Ted Haggard? Yeah, I’m still occasionally breaking out into impromptu jigs over Ted. But this guy? No. My heart actually goes out to him.

But just one question – how is it even possible that he can continue to believe in his heart that he wasn’t “born this way”?    

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Bush Sr. Emits Bodily Substance In Public For Second Time

7 December, 2006, Thursday

Oh dear.  Watching the video almost –almost– made me forgive him for his campaign trail remarks about atheists.    

But my petty grievances aside, it’s always a little sad to see evidence that a once-powerful man has, in his golden years, become a gooey, melted marshmallow.   

He broke down whilst giving a speech in honour of Jeb.   Now, of the two of his sons who hit the big time, could it really be possible that it’s Jeb who would cause such a well of emotion to bubble over?     He may have been talking about Jeb, but that doesn’t mean he was thinking about him.

It’s interesting that Bush Sr. lost all composure at the point when he spoke of Jeb not whining or complaining when he lost his 1994 bid for governor, vaguely suggesting his boy was a victim of dirty campaigning. 

If Jeb was a victim of dirty tricks, Bush Sr. must certainly know that his other son is widely regarded as being a perpetrator of them.    Politics is lousy with dirt, everybody knows that.  So what caused him to break down at that point? 

Being an unabashed Mama’s Girl, it’s with keen interest that I’ve watched George W. Bush repeatedly insult his father.    I’ve often wondered how painful it must be for him to have his past political decisions criticised, and any hard-earned personal insight publicly rejected by his very own son. 

Bush Sr., being a man, and a man who has spent his life in politics, likely still has a sizeable ego.    To have his own presidential term be publicly regarded as disastrous, and then to have his son use it as a comparison to remind us of what mistakes he will avoid making, well, that’s an awful lot of humility for one man to swallow in front of the nation. 

To love his son, and publicly support him all the while dodging the arrows that said son occasionally shoots at him must be enormously difficult. 

And here’s a thought: What if Bush Sr., on some level, actually sides with the majority of citizens and feels that his son is dangerously incompetent?   Talk about emotional turmoil. Wowee.

There’s no way any of us will ever know what was going on in his head when he cried. It very well could be what he said it was – that he’s just grown into a sentimental old man who gets weepy easily.

And that’s fair enough. Because no matter what prompted it, it was actually a very moving display and, by comparison, it makes George W. Bush look even more like the cold, heartless rat-out-his-own-father-for-cheap-political-gain bully that he is.  

So it’s a win/win.

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Kate Bush – Violin

4 December, 2006, Monday


Quite possibly the most fantastic artifact I have ever unearthed on YouTube.

The person who uploaded it described this as “Kate in a bat costume performing Violin”.

And at the 1:37 mark in this video,, you will laugh at how inadequate that description is.

This is seriously awesome.

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The Most Loyal Little Soldier

1 December, 2006, Friday

From Think Progress:

 “Rice responded that Iraq is not a civil war because “the Iraqis don’t see it that way.” Rice added, “it really doesn’t help to speak about their circumstance as a civil war, in terms that they don’t speak about their circumstances.”

Condi Rice, ridiculously niggling over semantics on the CBS evening news. 

In this most recent lie-fest, she proves that she will do or say anything to protect her boss.   And it appears she will continue to do it until the bitter end.   

In her Rah-Rah-Bush! zeal, she’s like the last act in an amateur recital;  a manic tap dancer desperately trying to save a show that’s gone on for far too long, with too many missteps.  

Sticking like flypaper to her talking points, relentlessly repeating her lies, she’s tapping for all that she’s worth. 

If people weren’t, like, dying because of her, I’d be inclined to admire her for standing so steadfastly by her man.   But streets littered with corpses have a way of tarnishing things.