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Christian Rocks Hard In A Pink Shirt (and, sadly, no ascot)

24 January, 2007, Wednesday

Ladies and Gentleman, I am excited about this faaaabulous new musical talent!

Donnie Davies is a man who used to know his way round the butt plug and anal beads aisle at the Porn Empornium.    But all that changed after he was filled with the stickiest man-goo the world has ever known: God’s love.   

Now he’s a crusader fighting against sin, a beacon of hope to afflicted men who want to make the gay go away, and a brilliant lyricist with a knack for powerful imagery:

Read the Bible
and you’ll be sure
to enter heaven
there’s no back door
Righteous man
get on your knees
there lies no virtue
in sodomy

From his website:   

I’ve been researching for many years now and feel I’ve come up with a very strong program to help cure people of Homosexuality. Its called the C.H.O.P.S program and We’re running full steam ahead with it. C.H.O.P.S stands for:

  • C: Changing
  • H: Homosexuals
  • O: (into) Ordinary
  • P: People

Oscar Wilde, my hero, was a reformed homosexual. He went to prison for his sins. Once he was alone with his thouhgts, in jail, he saw the errors of his ways and repented. He died as a Christian. While I’m not advocating jailing all Homosexuals, I do think it would benefit them greatly. It would be for their own good. When a person is forced to think they will generally be able to see their problems and solve them by themselves.

Okay, so he’s not very hip to the sort of activity that men get up to in the clink, but whatever, let’s not quibble and spoil his message of compassion and tolerant Christian guidance. Besides he clearly says he’s not for jailing ALL homosexuals and that is more than decent.

Christian soccer moms, if your son is showing an unhealthy interest in the theatrical arts or fashion, go grab the li’l mincing sodomite and huddle with him round the speakers and let Donnie’s beautiful song set him straight.

The rest of you, just enjoy. And then repent for all that ass fucking.

(If YouTube pulls the video, see it here. And if that link doesn’t work, my god, search for it. You must see it to believe it.)

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3 comments

  1. Do heterosexuals have to repent for ass fucking too?


  2. I’m not sure. But I’ll bet if the woman enjoyed it, then yes.


  3. Good work. How am I suppose to love God’s way?



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